Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

Let me tell you about my magickal journey out from a shell that has held me prisoner to Samantha or towards "Had, the manifestation of Nuit" (AL:I:1). You see, Samantha is a dog; mostly Beagle and part Pug. I found her in a garbage can outside a bar. Somebody had abandoned her. Yet I knew instantly that she belonged to me. She was sent by the Goddess to teach me how to care for another.

She is the vehicle that carries many lessons and mysteries. I have had to learn patience and perseverence amongst other subtle things that I would have difficulty in relating. And I have a mirror to the mystery of my own shadow. What I project out into the great expanse (Nuit) is manifested in this ritual that I call Samantha; training a 3 1/2 pound puppy into a dog that will soon become 40-60 pounds.

"Is a god to live in a dog? . . . " (AL:II:19); well, maybe not. But the god (or goddess) may choose to manifest there for a temporary spell -- pun intended. There is something in this that tells me that dealing with this situation could be the result of a direct dealing with God (or at least mine Holy Guardian Angel) upon the nature of my soul. A tempering is being hammered out so that I might become better suited for some form of initiatory experience.

When I caught this feeling, I said this is a must and I will go with it. And let me tell you that it is some major piece of work. For I know that her experience on this planet is directly affected by how well I manage the ritual; training and cleaning up after her; walking and exercising her; et al. She is the visible manifestation of this work and the results of this experiment will be undisputable. ". . . Success is your proof; courage is your armour; go on, go on, in my strength; & ye shall turn not back for any!" (AL:III:46).

You see, there is a certain sense of alienation that has always affected my life. This has left me with a bitter taste in my mouth as I have traveled in and out of relationships with 'others'. And there has always been a blind spot within my purview of these situations. And I asked myself, "What is wrong with me?"; a question that I had never been able to satisfactorily answer. And I had been asking this most ferverently when I 'chanced' upon this cute, little, helpless puppy.

And now this single guy has begun a ritual of growth and relationship that will take years to come full-cycle. My heart goes out to her when I am at work. And I feel her heart reaching for me. Waiting so desperately for me to come home. ". . . I love you! I yearn to you! Pale or purple, veiled or voluptuous, I who am all pleasure and purple, and drunkenness of the innermost sense, desire you. Put on the wings, and arouse the coiled splendour within you: come unto me!" (AL:I:61).

There is an happiness here that has so subtly invaded the view-finder of my everyday consciousness. "Intoxicate the inmost, O my lover, not the outermost!" (LXV:I:64). I now carry it with me everywhere I go and in everything that I do and think. This is the contemporary result of this great work. My 'Magickal Childe' if you will. And I ask myself, "Where is this taking me?" and "How will this new consciousness develop?"

"Who art thou that dost float and fly and dive and soar in the inane? Behold, these many aeons have passed; whence camest thou? Whither wilt thou go? And laughing I chid him, saying: No whence? No whither! The swan being silent, he answered: Then, if with no goal, why this eternal journey? And I laid my head against the Head of the Swan, and laughed, saying: Is there not joy ineffable in this aimless winging? Is there not weariness and impatience for who would attain to some goal? And the swan was ever silent. Ah! but we floated in the infinite Abyss. Joy! Joy! White swan, bear thou ever me up between thy wings!" (LXV:II:21-25).

And so what of the next generation? "I give unimaginable joys on earth: certainty, not faith, while in life, upon death; peace unutterable, rest, exctasy; nor do I demand aught in sacrifice." (AL:I:58). With this agent of fortune, I bequeathe myself to the continuance of this life. And I know that as I evolve, so those that follow in generation will benefit thereby and take our race onto even new hights and glory that we cannot even conceive in this time.

"Come, let us no more reason together; let us enjoy! Let us be ourselves, silent, unique, apart." (VII:VII:34). Let's not worry about this life or what we have to impart to those who would follow us. Let us (me) strive to live this moment to its fullest; knowing that this is all that any subsequent generation needs from me. When I have become 'tuned-in' to this even more fully, then can I act even more impeccably. It is this impeccability that I practiced (so unconsciously) when I first encountered Samantha.

Her presence is tough work, but real joy. I don't worry about where we will be at some future point in time, or when she might be finally paper-trained. There is so much about her right now that is adorable. And these moments are to be cherished as they happen. This is the nature of a warrior; to recognize these moments and seize them. ". . . Conquer! That is enough . . ." (AL:III:11).

". . . plot of our life sweats in the dark like a face.the exploding mystery of childbirth.of childhood itself.grave visitations.placid offers.what is it that calls to us? why must we pray screaming? why should not death be redefined? we shut our eyes stretch out our arms and whirl on a pane of glass.

"an afixiation a fix on anything the line of life lingua love limb of tree the hands of he and the promise that s/he is blessed among women." Patti Smith 1979ev.

Love is the law, love under will.